If only...

So tragically, it appears that ChristWire.org is a spoof. I say tragically not just because articles such as Vatooing: new female freshman trap for upstanding college men (them wanton hussies have been getting "suggestive tatoos, placed as near possible to their pubic and compelling sin regions" - sin regions! I say again, sin regions!) are less holy-heathens-I'm-going-to-actually-die funny when they're not real, but also because, if the site were genuine, this would be my favourite targeted advertising whoopsie of all time.